Were the conspiracy theorists right? Did the UK have a pact with aliens? Did they borrow technology from crashed UFOs? Was Margaret Thatcher being secretly controlled by an alien implant? Now the truth is out. The Ministry of Defense in the UK has just declassified their previously secret UFO files. What amazing secrets did they reveal? Not much. There was the usual delusional human who claims he was in physical and psychic contact with aliens since he was a lad (an alien pedophile, perhaps?), the standard photos of homemade UFOs dangling from wires, and the geriatric "abductee" who was not worthy of their time because of his age. What was missing from the files was any actual evidence of aliens visiting our pale blue dot. This is hardly surprising given the immense distances the little grey men would have to travel to reach our little planetary paradise. And for that we should be grateful. All the intelligent life forms on this planet are predators. The last thing we need is to be a tasty place to stop for a snack on a hyperspatial express route.